The bad news is the Sonoma County Fair is closed today. The good news is it's open tomorrow, and through Sunday.
In a world where terrorists threaten to blow up embassies, where lunatics drive their cars into vacationing beachgoers and even our National Pastime is beset by another cheating scandal, the fair stands out as an oasis of wholesome fun.
Not so wholesome that you can't kick up your heels, down a few drinks and drop some cash at the horse races, mind you. But as wholesome as you want it to be.
A recent headline said the Sonoma County Fair offers “something for everyone,” but that really isn't true. If you're the guy or gal looking for guns-and-gore shoot-'em-up entertainment, you'll need to head to your local movie house and not the fairgrounds. If you want a quiet acre of serenity, you won't find it at the fair.
But you'll find pretty much everything else. If the dizzying heights of the Ferris wheel leave you gasping for breath, head to the oxygen bar for replenishment. If you overdose on petals and greenery at the Hall of Flowers, find some balance in the dusty confines of the Chris Beck Arena. If the power, speed and grace of thoroughbred horse racing overwhelms your senses, duck into the Fur and Feathers building and gaze upon a humongous rabbit in obese repose.
The fair presents a kaleidoscopic assault on the senses. The smell of caramel corn and garlic fries. The clatter of the Olympic Bobsled Coaster. The humid mist inside the butterfly exhibit. The dirt and dung of the racing paddocks. Rock and roll from the Park Stage. Mariachi from the Mexican Village. The pitch from the pitchman: “Honeymooners? No? Well, let me send you on a honeymoon!”
Some visitors prefer to eat their way through the fair, returning for perennial favorites or gobbling concoctions they avoid in other seasons. The Pasta King's pesto. Funnel cakes. Turkey drumsticks that conjure images of Barney Rubble. This summer you can also find lobster corn dogs and Krispy Kreme bacon cheeseburgers. All the food groups.